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Plans revealed for Cabaret site

By Judith Pannebaker BCC Editor

Courtesy photo
Check out what might be coming to the Cowboy Capital of the World!

Although it’s still hush-hush, sotto voce and strictly on the QT, the Bandera County Courier has learned about possible plans for the site of the old Cabaret Dance Hall.
And, wonder of wonders, someone has finally agreed to speak “on the record” regarding those plans. Surprisingly, the site will not serve as the future home of a new giant pharmacy. However, something just as big – but less annoying – is in the offing.
It appears negotiations are moving forward for the eventual installation of a specially designed 450-foot high Cowboy Capital Classic Ferris Wheel. The western-centric wheel-like whirler will enable the Cowboy Capital of the World to join other municipalities with similar attractions, such as London, England; Atlanta, Georgia; Chicago, Illinois; Santa Monica, California; Yokohama, Japan; and Melbourne, Australia, among others.
The artist’s rendering shows how the colossal – yet somewhat surprisingly tasteful – ferris wheel will be situated on what is now a semi-vacant lot on Main Street.
“This spectacular tourist draw will put Bandera on the map as a unique Texas destination,” said Buff Orpington, a cliché-ridden spokesman for the developer.
In an interview, Orpington continued. “This fabulous attraction will provide fun for people of all ages, which is said of every celebratory weekend in Bandera.” He also predicted the feature on Main Street would work “hand-in-glove” with the oft-proposed skateboard installation in Bandera City Park.
Orpington added, “We anticipate no yipping and yapping from city council about the three- four- or more-storied edifice – especially after they learn how much money this Brobdingnagian baby will add to their coffers. And, keep in mind, we’re asking for neither public subsidies nor tax breaks.”
Orpington anticipated the gargantuan ferris wheel would be up and running – fingers crossed! – by April 1, 2017. And, the Courier Crew will elbow their way to be first in line for its inaugural spin.