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2015-12-17

Law West and East of Privilege Creek

By Buff Orpington BCC Stringer

Monday, Dec. 7:
• Defying logic and the law in his own county, a Kerr-Vert scooted south where he was promptly arrested for driving without a license, failing to appear and for a felony bench warrant.
• A felony failure-to-appear warrant put the skids on the good times of a Pipe Creep, who remains in the quod for his bad judgment.
• A Scofflaw from San & Tone also tarries in stir on account of being caught due to a warrant from an outside agency and for felony possession of some Penalty Group 1 controlled substance.
Tuesday, Dec. 8:
• A 17-year-old local weedwacker was caught with both blunt and paraphernalia.
• A Bad-Tempered Banderan found herself charged with assault with bodily injury.
Wednesday, Dec. 9:
• A 24-year-old Lickspittle from Livingston remains confined to the county cooler for a trio of felonies, including carrying more than one but less than four grams of a controlled substance, failing to appear and for a warrant that might revoke her probation.
• A Pipe Creek Perp also continues as a guest in the X Bar Inn after being nicked for felony burglaries of both a building and a house, and misdemeanor that include a traffic offence and driving without a license.
Thursday, Dec. 10:
• Another guest taking advantage of the largesse of the local taxpayers is a Kretin from Kerrville, who was pinched for burglary of a habitation and stealing a vehicle, which is known by the legalese "unauthorized use of a motor vehicle."
• Uh, oh - a 17-year-old Lakehills Laddie found himself in felonious hot water for assaulting a public servant.
Friday, Dec. 11:
• A Bodacious Bandera Blockhead remains in the county can for purportedly possessing the ubiquitous PG 1 controlled substance - with additional charges pending most likely.
• A local yokel was caught attempting to do some criminal mischief - or perhaps he succeeded. At any rate, he was arrested.
• A Lakehills Lunkhead violated a court order and hopefully must Pay the Piper - whoever he is.
• This kills me. A Cowboy Capital Criminal resisted arrest. To which, I must point out, seemingly not successfully.
• A Crapulent denizen of the Creek District appeared to be pissed in public.
• As was his drinking buddy. However, this guy had the bad luck to be from "South of the Border ..." and thus must remain in the gaol awaiting his ride back home or wherever.