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2015-03-12

Law West and East of Privilege Creek

By Judith Pannebaker BCC Editor

Monday, March 2:
• A Drunk from Dyersburg was apparently publically pickled.
• A Lakehills Liar not only failed to appear previously, but also might have his probation pulled.
• A Felon from F'burg remains under Lock & Key on account of - what else? - a felony warrant that might revoke his probation.
• A Medina meshugener was caught driving while liquored up.
• A Bandera Boobie is still enjoying three hots and a cot - courtesy of local taxpayers - because he was being dogged by two felony warrants that may eventually revoke his probation.
Tuesday, March 3:
• A Befuddled Fellow from Fredericksburg found himself taken into custody for a second DWI.
• So, only after a Bad-Tempered Beauty from River City had been charged with assault by contact was it also revealed she had a failure-to-appear warrant in her background, as well.
• A trio of weedwackers from the Cowboy Capital was picked up for possessing pot and a pipe with which to smoke it.
Wednesday, March 4:
• A Lakehills Lawbreaker found himself in hot water - and still in the can - after he was detained on a so-called felony Blue Warrant that may put a kibosh to his parole.
• A Bandera Babe was charged with being unable to hold her likker.
• Whereas another Lovely Local Yokel, who remains in Bandera's Big House, may also have her probation revoked.
• An Alky A-Hole from Aransas Pass was found to be driving while three sheets to the wind, but only for a first time.
Thursday, March 5:
• Well, name your poison(s). Not only was a Bandera Blockhead collared for a second DWI, but he was also found to be carrying a "dangerous drug" while doing it.
• A Sinner from Center Point remains incarcerated on a sextet of misdemeanor warrants, including two for driving without a license, two for failing to appear, one "other" and another from an outside agency.
• We hope a first DWI is sufficient to send a souse from the Lake District to temperance meetings.
Friday, March 6:
• A felony failure-to-appear warrant sent a Pipe Creep to the slammer, where he remains.
• A Bodacious Bandera Babe was caught red-handed carrying inhalant paraphernalia.
• A Maniac from Manor assaulted someone with bodily injury and thus remains in the quod for his ill-starred decision.
• A Pettifog from Pearsall thought he could get away with bouncing rubber checks in Bandera. He didn't.
•Yet another Souse from San Antone now has on his record a second DWI. Hey, buddy, another strike and yer out!
Saturday, March 7:
• I love this arrest. A 19-year-old Master Criminal from Bandera is still locked up on account of six misdemeanor traffic warrants - and for having some blunt, as well.
• Stop the presses! A Toper from Pipe Creek has accumulated a first DWI.
Sunday, March 8:
• Before being sent back South of the Border, a Bandera Bandito managed to assault someone with bodily injury and do something untoward regarding 9-1-1 calls. He's still in the slammer.