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- Law West and East of Privilege Creek -

By Judith Pannebaker BCC Editor

Monday, June 2:
• A Medina Miscreant violated a court order.
• A Boyo from Bandera spent almost a week in the can after being arrested on a quintet of misdemeanors, including three counts of failing to follow the instructions of previous courts, failing to appear and for the proverbial traffic warrant.
• A Lush from Lakehills reached the ripe age of 57 before being nicked for his first DWI.
Tuesday, June 3:
• A weedwacker must have thought he was still in Austin, but he wasn't and so he was arrested for being caught with a blunt.
• For making a terroristic threat, a San Antonian was declared by me to be a Sanpletonian.
• Too bad this Pipe Creek Cutie decided to consume a couple of cocktails and then take to the road. That might had led to her first DWI.
• A Lunkhead from Lakehills made the bad decision to assault a public servant and now he faces a felony charge.
• A Bandera Boozer hit 60 - that's years, not MPH - before being hit with her first DWI charge.
• A 17-year-old pugilist from Pipe Creek apparently assaulted someone with bodily injury.
Wednesday, June 4:
• Whereas, a River City Rassler - hey, it scans! - went a step further and purportedly committed aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, ramping up a misdemeanor to a felony charge.
• A pair of misdemeanor warrants from an outside agency gave law enforcement officers the green light to pick up a Pipe Creep.
• This Laddie from Lakehills saw the Pipe Creep one warrant from an outside agency and raised him two capius pro fine warrants.
• Another Bandera Bonehead celebrated Hump Day by initiating an assault with bodily injury, but that turned out to be the least of this guy's worries.
Thursday, June 5:
• A Pip from the Pipe District might have gone one toke over the line using inhalant paraphernalia - or maybe not.
• A Bruiser from Bandera showed how it was done, and, as a result, was arrested for assault by threat, resisting arrest and possessing a Penalty Grade 1 controlled substance. Could the latter charge be connected to the former charges?
• So, not only was this San Antonio Slug being housed for Gillespie County, he has also been charged with having a failure-to-appear warrant and for assault by contact, to boot. A fellow just can't catch a break.
Friday, June 6:
• This local yokel violated a court order, but again, that turned out to be the least of his worries.
• A Lakehills Lackey, caught using a motorized vehicle without garnering its owner's permission, remains confined to the county calaboose for his trouble.
Saturday, June 7:
• OMG, a 79-year-old guy from Vanderpool has been charged with his first DWI. Do ya think that's some kind of record?! Is there no one to bond this ole feller out of the hoosegow?
• A Floresville Fall Girl also remains in the Doo Drop Inn after found to be driving without the requisite license.
• A Couple of Putzes from Utopia are still enjoying three hots and a cot courtesy of Bandera County's law-abiding taxpayers, accused of being dogged by a misdemeanor warrant from an outside agency and for a first DWI and being in this country without benefit of legality, respectively - the putzes, not the taxpayers.
Sunday, June 8:
• Here we go again. A couple of Halfwits from Houston found themselves hauled off to the hoosegow for being pissed in public and for a felony warrant from an outside agency.
• A Souse from San Antone got nicked in Bandera for an ostensible first DWI.
• Another guy from the Pipe District remains under lock & key on two misdemeanors - assault by threat and for resisting arrest.
• And last but not least, a Hellion from Houston also remains in Bandera's Big House for fabricating or tampering with evidence.