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2014-05-29

- Law West and East of Privilege Creek -

By Judith Pannebaker BCC Editor

Monday, May 19:
• A Lakehills Lunkhead, who thought he could get away with "borrowing" a vehicle belonging to someone else without actually getting the real owner's permission, found himself charged with a felony instead.
• A Bandera Blockhead spent but a few hours in the slammer despite being charged with felony possession of a controlled substance and for being dogged by a quartet of misdemeanor capius pro fine warrants.
• Yet another fine upstanding Cowboy Capital Citizen has been charged with felony aggravated sexual assault and felony indecency with a child-sexual conduct. He also bonded out posthaste. What a jerk, but, that's just my opinion. I could be wrong.
• A court ordered that a Bandera Boyo be picked up on a felony charge and so he was and, luckily, so he remains - incarcerated, that is.
• As does a Lakehills Lawbreaker who has been charged with felony sexual assault.
• Meanwhile, another wonderful example of citizenry in the Lake District was merely nicked for possession of inhalant paraphernalia and a pesky "other" warrant.
Tuesday, May 20:
• When a Bad Boy from Boerne was stopped for his second DWI, apparently John Law also discovered he was carrying a firearm illegally.
Wednesday, May 21:
• A 62-year-old Bandera Boozer has been busted for his first DWI - in Bandera, imagine that!
Thursday, May 22:
• Not content with being charged with a misdemeanor first DWI, A Lackey from Laredo compounded his legal woes by attempting - albeit unsuccessfully - to evade arrest with a vehicle, a felony to be sure.

Now, what do you suppose this Laughing-Stock from Lakehills did to warrant being slapped with a contempt of court charge?
• Some anger management sessions might be in order for a Birdbrain from Bandera who is facing a misdemeanor assault with bodily injury charge.
• An Effete from Ellettsville remains confined to our county calaboose for a felony failure-to-appear warrant and a trio of misdemeanors, including resisting arrest, public intoxication and a warrant from an outside agency.
Friday, May 23:
• To celebrate the beginning of Bandera's Memorial weekend, an A-Hole from Austin found himself an unexpected guest of the X Bar Inn after being nabbed for a failure-to-appear warrant and a first DWI.
• A Cretinous Wonk from Camp Wood also remains under Lock & Key for felony possession of a controlled substance.
• Despite his second DWI being a misdemeanor, a Lakehills Loon - and we don't mean a BIRD! - also remains a guest of the Doo Drop Inn.
Saturday, May 24:
• A Bandera Buffoon thought he could tool along with impunity without a license. He was wrong.
Sunday, May 25:
• A Blackguard from Bandera remains behind bars on account of purportedly failing to take to heart the suggestions of a previous court.