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- Law East and West of Privilege Creek -

By Judith Pannebaker BCC Editor

Monday, May 5:
• A Lakehills Lovely - old enuff to know better - failed to foster an uptapped source of income after she was arrested for felony possession of more than four grams but less than 200 grams of a controlled substance and for misdemeanor possession of a mere dangerous drug.
• A 19-year-old master-criminal-in-training from the Lake District was stopped cold - overnight, at least - by a misdemeanor warrant from an outside agency.
Another Lackey from Lakehills was nicked for driving without a license.
• A Sinner from Schertz couldn't shake a misdemeanor warrant from an outside agency.
• A couple of failure-to-appear warrants put the kibosh on the good times of a Cretin from Corpus.
• After mixing it up, a couple of not-so-well-behaved Banderans found themselves charged with assault with bodily injury.
• Another local yokel formerly ascribed to the theory that "sticks and stones may break your bones, but names will never hurt you." However, in this case, he was arrested for making a terroristic threat.
Tuesday, May 6:
• A Tarpley Tippler was nabbed for a second DWI.
• A Pipe Creep found it difficult to outrun a felony warrant from an outside agency.
• An outstanding capius pro fine warrant finally caught up with a Bandera Bad Boy.
Wednesday, May 7:
• A Banderan's plan to cook and deliver less than four grams of a PG 1 controlled substance backfired and he's still spending some time in the slammer for his trouble.
• Ditto a Kerr-Vert, but he's still in for felony possession of more than four grams but less than 200 grams of a controlled substance, and for plus two misdemeanor traffic warrants, as well.
• A Bandera Babe didn't stay in the can too long for being dogged by two misdemeanor warrants that may revoke her probation.

Friday, May 9:
• Oh, no, this Bandera Trifecta includes public intoxication, weed wacking and having the pipe to smoke it with. Three misdemeanors and the culprit is still lounging in the local lockup.
• A felony warrant from an outside agency seemed sufficient to send a provincial pariah to the penitentiary - well, jail - where he remains.
• A Dipsomaniac from Mason spent a night in the choky after he was caught pie-eyed in public.
• Here's an 18 year old on his way to fame and fortune. He's still in Bandera's Big House for two misdemeanor warrants - one for failing to appear and a second that may revoke his previous probation. Hitch yer wagon to a star, cowboy.
Saturday, May 10:
• A 21-year-old San Antone Sot, who can now legally consume a refreshing adult beverage, was picked up for his first DWI. Down the hatch, idjit!!!
• A denizen of Pipe Creek was picked up for misdemeanor "binder appr/pros" - whatever the Sam Hill, that is!
• So, two possible cohorts in crime, a Sweetie from San Antone and the ubiquitous Bubba from Bandera were stopped in their tracks due to two felony warrants from an outside agency. Bubba is free on bail, however.
• Okay, here's the deal, boneheads. If you have an outstanding traffic warrant and you don't have liability insurance, the least you can do while motoring merrily along is to adhere to the posted speed limits. Or not and get arrested. I really don't care as long as you're off the road for a while.
Sunday, May 11:
• A Bandera Boozer celebrated the Sabbath by picking up his second DWI.
• A warrant from an outside agency stopped a Scofflaw from San Antonio in his tracks - for a couple of hours at least.
• Here we go again. If you're driving without a license, obey all the traffic regulations so as not to attract the attention of our roving law enforcement officers. This guy didn't.
• What a thing! Yet another Bandera Bonehead has failed to follow the directions of a previous court as a capius pro fine warrant can attest.