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- Law West and East of Privilege Creek -

By Judith Pannebaker BCC Editor

And, now, in our ever-popular Keep Austin Weird" segment, the following arrest occurred at midnight on March 9 in the 2300 block of the frontage road of Interstate 35 North:
Public Intoxication: A non-University of Texas subject was observed stumbling, staggering and falling while walking along the inside lane of the frontage road in an area where the frontage road is located 15 feet above the interstate. When stopped, the subject believed she was walking on a sidewalk along Lamar Boulevard. The subject was upset over a recent break-up and had obviously been trying to "drown her sorrows" to the point that she had become a physical endangerment to herself and the passing motorist below. The subject did not agree with the officer's assessment to make an arrest as she made feeble attempts to resist the inevitable.

Now, back to Bandera County:

Tuesday, March 4:
• A pair of Bad-Tempered Banderans were nicked for misdemeanor assault with bodily injury.
• A 73-year-old - certainly old enough to know better - Alky from Clute was detained on a first DWI.
• A 51-year-old Bandera weedwacker was busted for being one - and not in Colorado or that other state.
• Two felony bench warrants warranted that a Pipe Creep be picked up and he was and so he remains.
Wednesday, March 5:
• A felony warrant from an outside agency was issued for a Boob from Bandera, who was summarily caught and released.
Thursday, March 6:
• So, not only was this Sinner from Sabinal being housed for Real County, he was also, for good measure, hit with a felony warrant from an outside agency.
• Oh, yeah, I heard about this one. A Bonehead from Bandera's luck might have run out after he was charged with misdemeanor evading arrest, and felony resisting arrest with a weapon and for aggravated assault on a police officer. How do ya like them apples, you scoundrel?!
Friday, March 7:
• A local yokel has been charged with felony possession of a PG 1 controlled substance. Now, I ask you, what else does a fella got to do on a Friday night in the Hill Country?
• A malefactor from Schertz was in and out of the County Can in good time after being nabbed on account of a misdemeanor warrant from an outside agency.
• Public intoxication plus two felony warrants that may eventually revoke his probation proved to be the undoing of a Bad Boy from Bandera.
• A Lakehills Lunkhead was out of the calaboose in record time after being booked for misdemeanor driving without a license and felony fraudulent use of ID.
Saturday, March 8:
• No matter what other states decide to do, weed is still illegal in the Lone Star State, dude!
• The good times of a Freak from Fresno skidded to a halt after he was booked for resisting arrest, driving without a license and for possession of a PG 1 controlled substance.
• A good citizen of the Lake District miraculously made it to the ripe age of 53 before being stopped for a first DWI.
Sunday, March 9:
• However, not so a sot from Red Banks, who was only 34 at the time of his fateful decision to drink and drive.