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Law West & East of Privilege Creek

By Judith Pannebaker BCC Editor

Tuesday, March 27:
A Boozer from Bandera was busted for being unable to hold her likker in public.

A Laggard from La Vernia remains in Bandera's Big House on account of a misdemeanor warrant that could possibly revoke his probation.

Wednesday, March 28:
A San Antone Sluggard was nabbed for weed wacking.

Thursday, March 29:
An 18-year-old Stooge-In-Training from Spring Branch found herself in hot water after being charged with two felonies, including a warrant from an outside agency and, for good measure, burglary of a building.

A Hick from St. Earwig - I mean, Hedwig - remains a Guest of the Do Drop Inn after it was determined he was being dogged by a felony warrant from an outside agency.

An ill-tempered Pipe Creep was sent to the slammer, charged with felony aggravated assault.

A Pipsqueak from Pipe Creek and a Hellion from Houston were both charged with being inebriated behind wheels. For his transgression, the local lush remains a guest of the Grey Bar Inn.

Friday, March 30:
A local pothead - certainly old enough to know better - was picked up.
Well, this little deal turned into quite a series of stops by local law enforcement authorities. A quartet of Bandera Blockheads (and I do mean Blockheads), ranging in age from 17 to 26 years, found themselves tightly gripped by the Long Arm of the Law and charged with - take a deep breath - felony possession of a controlled substance, misdemeanor pot possession, felony evading arrest with a vehicle and felony possession of a prohibited weapon. All the fine, upstanding specimens of local yewts remain incarcerated.

Oh, and a Slug from San Antonio, who was charged with pot possession, bailed out of Bandera's Big House posthaste.

Saturday, March 31:
Yet another Bad-Tempered Bandera Bumpkin might have committed a crime that might eventually revoke his parole.

Another Saturday night in the Hill County, another lady arrested for being pissed in public.

A local loafer remains a guest of the X Bar Inn after being charged with a trifecta of misdemeanors, including an "other" warrant, a failure-to-appear warrant and a traffic warrant.

If I've said it once, I've said in a couple of times. If you're being dogged by a string of warrants, at least try to obey the traffic laws. Geesch!

A Geek from Granite Shoals apparently couldn't rid himself of MJ or dangerous drugs before local law enforcement swooped in.

A 22-year-old Kingsland Queenie purported went one toke over the line.

Not content to be charged with just a first DWI, a moron from Murfreesboro resisted arrest, thus adding to the charges.

Surprise, surprise, a 57-year-old Bandera Boyo was picked up for his first DWI. At least, he didn't put up a fight. We do have some manners here in Bandera.

Sunday, April 1:
A raft of people found theirselves in trouble on April Fool's Day - a Nincompoop from Pleasure Island and a Hanger-on from Helotes, first DWIs; an Imbecile from Beaumont, second DWI; Bandera Bad Girl, driving without a license; New Braunfels Ninny, order for incarceration; and a pair of River City Revelers, public intoxication and pot possession. Only the Ninny from New Braunfels remains under watchful lock and key.

Monday, April 2:
Two misdemeanor warrants from an outside agency seemed sufficient to send a local yokel to the slammer where he remains.

And, finally, another fine, upstanding citizen also remains a guest of the county after being picked up for criminal trespass.